Love Marriage vs Arranged Marriage

Love Marriage vs Arrange Marriage:

• Some people prefer a love marriage, whereas others are in favour of an arranged marriage. So, love marriage vs arranged marriage is an evergreen topic for discussion and debate.

Advantages of Love Marriage:

• Marriage is a life-long commitment. So, the decision to choose a life partner should be in one’s own hands.
• Love is the basis of any marriage. In love marriages, there will be no question of whether love happens or not.
• In Love marriages, the couple knows each other very well and most probably they already understand each other fully. Hence, there won’t be many conflicts.
• Those who want to go for a love marriage have more choices than those who go for an arranged marriage because arranged marriages mostly happen with people of the same caste/class/religion.
• Planned love lives result in happy families.
• Generally, equality prevails in love marriages.

Disadvantages of Love Marriage:

• The couple who go for a love marriage is mostly independent. If they want to get out of the relationship, they do not consider relatives’ opinions and society much. So, they tend to go for divorce for even small reasons.
• Love marriages are still socially unacceptable in some parts of India. That is the reason we are witnessing honour killings. So, it is quite risky for some people to go for a love marriage.
• Youngsters may confuse attraction with love.
• Love is not the only thing we need in life. One should also check the reality like the family background, economic conditions, the environment they grew up in, the person’s behaviour etc. to live a peaceful life and to avoid conflicts beforehand.

Advantages of Arranged Marriage:

• In arranged marriages, parents do inquire about each other’s family and their circle. So, there is a high probability that one will get into a relationship with a similar kind of family as theirs. This prevents trusting people blindly, which happens in some love marriages.
• Parents or well-wishers think about future and economic conditions.
• The couple most likely thinks about both of their families. So, they will learn to adjust, which is a very good quality for any relationship.
• According to research conducted by Dr Robert Epstein, an American psychologist, love in love marriages tends to fade away with time, whereas love in arranged marriages grows with time.

Disadvantages of Arranged Marriage:

• An arranged marriage is like a lottery. Love may or may not blossom between the couple. Some couples will face compatibility issues.
• The couple does not know each other well if they spend less time together before marriage. If they have many differences to the extent that they cannot live together, marriage will break.
• Too much submissiveness to elders may restrict couples from divorcing, even if they do not have love between them anymore.
• Though the divorce rate is lower in arranged marriages compared to love marriages, it cannot be said that they are happily married. In general, some people who are living in unhappy marriages but are not able to divorce due to several reasons such as children, and societal pressure tend to opt for suicide.
• People who go for arranged marriage may not be that comfortable discussing everything in detail before marriage. This may cause problems after marriage.
• In the name of arranged marriages, forced marriages are still prevalent in many parts of India.

Conclusion:

Whether it is a love marriage or an arranged marriage, the relationship will work only if both the partners are serious and honest in the relationship. Life partner must be selected according to their own will and not by force. These days, people are taking time to learn about each other before marriage even in arranged marriages. This is a sign of a progressive society.

Photo credits: Shaun Anyi

Your Turn…

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